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[07 Jul 2004|11:14am] |
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There's a song that's inside of my soul. It's the one that I've tried to write over and over again. I'm awake in the infinite cold, but You sing to me over and over and over again. So i lay my head back down, and i lift my hands and pray to be only yours. I pray to be only yours, I know You're my only hope. Sing to me of the song of the stars, of your galaxy dancing and laughing and laughing again. When it feels like my dreams are so far, sing to me of the plans that You have for me over again. I give You my apathy, I'm giving You all of me. I want your symphony, singing in all that I am. At the top of my lungs I'm giving it back...
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[06 Jul 2004|06:40pm] |
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Monday found me on my knees again, breathing you in. To blur the lines that mark where i begin, and where You end. No use trying to pretend. Come take me again, 'cause rumor has it I'm not who I've been,...come define me. What can we do if the rumors are true? I turn everything over, I turn myself in. There's nothing left of me to defend. The evidence convicts the hollow men after looking inside. To my dismay i find I'm just one of them. 'cause I'm an already but not yet redurrected fallen kid. Come break this Lombo, and I know You know just who I've been...Come define me
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[06 Jul 2004|10:16am] |
5/23/2004
I wish I had what I needed, to be on my own. 'cause i feel so defeated, and I'm feeling alone. And it all seems so helpless, and I have no plans. I'm a plane in the sunset, with no where to land. And all I see it could never make me happy, and all my sand castles spend their time collapsing. Let me know that You hear me, Let me know Your touch. Let me know that You love me, and let that be enough. It's my birthday tomorrow, no one here could know. I was born on this monday, 16 years ago. And i feel stuck watching history repeating. Who am I? Just a kid who knows she's needy. So let me know that You hear me, Let me know Your touch. Let me know that You love me, and let that be enough
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[08 Jun 2004|10:15am] |
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"Somebody" *cough*Pablo*cough* lost my MONKEY!!!!
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[02 Jun 2004|04:55pm] |
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Today was hell! I ususally try not to break in front of my friends. When something is bothhering me i try and just keep it in till i get home, when im all alone. But today i broke. I sorry to whoever had to see me act as i did. I am lost, confused, tired, mad, sad...and i just don't care. I've talking to Steph, i hope she can help me out. I don't want ot be like i use to be, and i dont want people to see me like that. I swear that i wont show myself like that at school again, i hide myself to my own head, and keep my thoughts away from this world....
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[29 May 2004|03:54pm] |
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Do you remember when you were way back then? You held the world inside your hands. When you told me love was the strongest stuff. Your strength was innocence.
But, oh man...the signs of the times are omens. You're starting the day in no man's land again. Who are you gonna be? When you're on your knees, who do you believe? fear is a lonely man. you've been given innocence again.
You should know by now that the darkest hour is when your broken heart goes down. It's a bitter end when the sweet begins. grace is sufficiency.
we'll never deserve it...
we never could earn it...
now, here, the choice is yours...
Grace is high and low
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[29 May 2004|03:44pm] |
A day in LA, and millions of faces are looking for a movement. 'cause everything's stuck and everything's frozen, and everyone's broken. And nobody moves, and everyone's scared that the motion will never come. This is the incompletion stuck in a line. Love is the movement, love is a revolution. This is redemption. We don't have to slow back down. The stars are alive. They dance to the music, of the deepest emotion. All the world is singing in time, as the heavens are caving in. Mysterious ways, why God gave his life, to put motion inside mt soul. It's bigger than cold religion, it's bigger than life!
So this is the way that i say i need you, this is the way that i say i love you. This is the way that i say i'm yours, this is the way. This is the way i'm learning to breathe and i'm learning to crawl. I'm finding that You and You alone can break my fall. I'm living again, awake and alive. I'm dying to breathe in these abundant skies.
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| BUH BYE |
[23 May 2004|06:18pm] |
I love you all, but this Livejournal thing is over for me. I'll keep posting under other journals tho. Adios
-Pico
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| *TEARS* |
[21 May 2004|07:07pm] |
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Today was a difficult day for me. Well, skewl was good, but being home sucked. At school the drumline played during the assembly. It was fun. I almost dropped one of my players in my section(that would've sucked!)LOL...
Okay...well i got home, and spent almost two hours crying...It's kindda hard to understand the whole story. But the thing is that yesterday my uncle came oout of prison. He's been in there for a few years. He was my only father figure, he was just as much, even more, my dad that the stupid bastard that screwed my mom. I'm happy he's out, but its weird. I haven't even went to go see him yet! I don't know how things will turn out, expecially since he was put in prison for trying to kill my mom. *sigh...So two hours of crying then i fell asleep. Pablo called and woke me, thats good because i probly wouldv'e died in my sleep. SHe was gonna head out with me and my homies, but i guess her plans changed. After that i decided not to go out, so i'm here spending my friday, depressed, and my b-day party is tomorrow....hope it turned out well...
-Pico
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[14 May 2004|08:39pm] |
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Yay! i just came back from the play. It was so awesome! i had such a great time...every one was screaming my part, and i have almost no lines!!!okay, i have to clear something up...I DONT HAVE N E KIDS! its just an inside joke between me and some friends...wink wink. YAY!!!! my b day is comming up... =) i can't wait,... im gonna have an awesome party, with a bounce house and a pinata and every thing...WOW, im such a kid...EVERY 1 IN THE WORLD IS INVITEd!!! well, not every 1...okay.,..tired,,,buh bye....
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| Kodak Moment |
[09 May 2004|05:34pm] |
Yesterday was great. It was my sons second bithday. His daddy came over and we took Nicolae park. Both our families were there. So Keith took our son home and today me and keith went out. It was funn. we had a good time. I can't believe Nicolae is already two! he got so many gifts.... =)
(wink, wink...Sarah...=) )
-Mashi Maro, Crazy "j", Pico...or jus Jazmyn ...=)
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[06 May 2004|07:24pm] |
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Wow! I can’t explain into word exactly how I feel right now. For the past hour I have been lying outside on my trampoline, underneath the stars. I was just lying there looking up, listening to some worship songs. I was just looking up at the stars and how beautiful it all is. I was just thinking if God and so many other great things. It was awesome! I also say a shooting star. I began to cry and feel so many different types of emotions. I just lay there and cried and talked to God. I was just praying for so many people, and thanking God for his mercy and how he saved my life. I feel so good right now. I am filled with the Holy Spirit. This is a great jump-start for me….thank you…
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[05 May 2004|07:23pm] |
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I'm so tired. I just got home and still have alot of things to do...Homework, read my bible, finish all the scripts for the movie...BLAH,BLAH! Our play is comming up...YAY! we open wed. til saturday... Tomarrow we have testing....=(I didn't get much sleep last nite, hope i get a couple hourse tonite...Many ppl have been talking to me lately about Christianity. Its kindda kewl. I'll b praying for u guys...take care, love ya....
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| My second criminal Record!!! |
[02 May 2004|03:13pm] |
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What a morning! So me and someone, who will be unnamed, are cruzing around at about noon. Of couse she is going to do something as stupid as hitting a parked car...What a blond! Okay, so we freaked. We got out of the car to see the damage.. It was bad...i knew she was screwed. We go back in the car and she began to panic, and Miss. Dumb-ass took off! We hit a car and then took off. And what made it worse is that she was going 6o in a 30 mile speed zone! I told her just to turn back because for all we know we she will be in less trouble than if the cops got her...i guess i shouldn't have said that because as soon as i did, we saw a cop. So we are speeding and the lights go. The cop stoped us and now i'm thinking that i'm gonna get busted for being in the car w/ her! So she is crying and can't even talk, so the cop makes us get out of the car, we were searched, then they have her sit down. They ask me question and i was nervouse. It turns out he only stoped us for speed. It was kewl because we didn't end up getting a speeding ticket at all because the cop felt bad that my friend was crying....WHAT A MORNING! I wander how the rest of the day will b..???
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[01 May 2004|11:47pm] |
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Sleepy, Sleeping...i think its time to go 2 bed....
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[29 Apr 2004|07:27pm] |
OMG...Pablo, it wasNOT me! i swear...! dude, check out this sone me and Bonez wrote....*cough*
Nevermind, just ask us tomarrow....WOW, i have 8 new messages on my cell phone, brb......o its browniie...HEY, srry for not being Snazzy...love ya! =) Don't get MAD!...AHHH! i can't believe my dad has the nerves to call my CELL!!!!....Oh, Mad Mad House is on...G@G =)
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| DEADBEAT |
[29 Apr 2004|05:18pm] |
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I hate my dad. He is such an asshole!!! He makes me so mad. He called me and was acting like a jerk. If he ever comes near me i swear i'll kill him. Well, maybe not kill him, but hurt him in such a morbid way that...well, i donno. I swear though. I have forgiven him so many times in the past, but i just keep getting hurt by him. He makes me sick. AHHHHHH! I HATE YOU!....okay, well anyways, my day was good...Yo Katie....IT WASN'T MEE!!!
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| No More Money!!!! |
[27 Apr 2004|04:01pm] |
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MashiMaro, and Ebay, have just became my obsesion. I think im gonna get my butt beat when the people that i am living with find out that all my money in the bank is gone....OPPS, oh well...
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[26 Apr 2004|07:34pm] |
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I need to calm down, and i need to stop, and i am, right now. I'm sorry. I guess it'll start today. even though it should've started long ago. I just came back from walking to upland, my friend brought me back right now. We prayed and i just need help to get throught this. if people only knew what is going on.
but im okay now...things will get better...
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[26 Apr 2004|05:05pm] |
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I'm pissed and i hate this world! i don't know what to do. I'm trapped in this house and in this brain, while these thoughts still convey of suicide. I'm still depressed, im still tired, i'm still afraid...I don't want to let you in, i won't let ur in...But this time you'll die before i ever do... damn it! whats going on? i sit here and i cry, im so lost and confuse...i need to get away, i can't be alone with myself. I'm mad and i'm yelling. And i scream on the inside while these thoughts fllod my mine. And this blood that flows through my veins of a man that made me go insane...i quit, i can't take it any more!!!!what the heck am i suppose to do???
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